Slopes and Sam

17-06-05 by Sam

According to my ex-girlfriend, our most recent comics (and editorials apparently) have been somewhat lacking.  So I’ve devised today’s comic to have just a little more sting.  Which, incidentally, was her nickname for my penis.  Not because it’s small or anything.  It just really likes songs by the Police.

As you may have gathered, I was treated to a viewing of Batman Begins yesterday evening.  I went in with low expectations and came out with aching, contact-free eyes and a heart that pumped pure testosterone for Christian Bale.  I also liked the movie.

Just for the record, I have nothing against homosexuals.  I have at least one gay friend, and only every second thing that comes out of my mouth when I’m around him is a derogatory insult passed off as friendly ribbing.  I’ve even eaten a meal that he prepared with his hands.

It’s probably also wise to state, for the record, that I have no actual opinion on Tom Cruise’s sexuality.  As long as he continues to make shitty movies, I’ll continue to download them for free off the internet.  That way everybody’s happy.  Especially me.

Today sees the premier of our new font.  It’s slimmer, sexier, and smarter.  It makes the old font look like Nicole Kidman.  Yes, just like Tom Cruise, we’ve moved on.

It also sees some quasi-pornography appear in the third panel.  I've been wondering how long it would take this comic to descend into unadulterated smut.  Now if only I had my contacts...

Hang on, what the fuck are you doing?  No!  Put it away!

Save it for Batman Begins.  Remember, it’s dark in a cinema.  The only people who will see you are the complete strangers sitting right next to you…if they could take their eyes off Christian Bale and their hands away from their own genitals.

-Sam